Family Law Matters – Episode 98 – The Upsurge in Divorce

AdminBlog Posts, Primus Videos

 

(0:00 – 0:27)
Hi everyone, I’m Dr. Michael Mantell, always privileged to be joining Bonnie Rabinovitch-Mantel, owner and managing partner of the Primus Family Law Group. Hi Bonnie. Hi Michael, how are you doing today? I’m doing great, thanks for asking.

How are you doing? I’m doing wonderfully. Good, good, good. So Bonnie- Looking forward to hearing what people have to say these days.

(0:27 – 1:25)
Oh, well, one of the things that I’m hearing about is an interesting question. I actually never considered it before. And it has to do with the date that a couple separates.

And people are raising that question more and more lately. And I’m wondering, what’s behind that? Why is that becoming so, so important? Well, you know, in family law, the date of separation determines when things get divided, bank accounts, debts, retirement accounts. So you can see how if you pick a date, it can be very important as to whether or not you’re having to give more, get more, or you’re having to split more debt.

Because once that data separation is fixed, everything you’re doing afterward is your own problem, your own debts, your own money. But isn’t it, I mean, isn’t it clear? I move out this day. That’s the day we separated.

(1:26 – 1:52)
That may not be the day, because the day you move out, especially in today’s times, when, you know, there’s financial struggles just to meet ends meet, especially in California, you may have to still live under the same roof. So we get a lot of people separating bedrooms, one person lives here, one person lives there. Or sometimes, you know, one person will go to a friend’s for a few days, that kind of thing, but they still have to live in the same home.

(1:53 – 4:22)
What it is, is it’s a subjective intent, Michael, when you were done with the marriage, you have to communicate that intent, you have to do something about it, it can’t just be up in your head. And you also have to kind of show the world in the sense that you’re not sending any more birthday cards and Christmas cards and going to the Christmas party and my wife, my husband, you know, the all of those things that people do as a couple can be used as evidence to determine dates of separation, because, believe it or not, people often will argue and not by months, sometimes it’s by years, Michael. And then if you’ve got years, we’re talking about could be a lot of money, one way or the other.

So wait a minute. Now, this is going to sound like I’m being, you know, a little bit sarcastic, I’m not being go back to this business about the holiday cards. A couple who has agreed, we’re divorcing, we’re separating, but we can’t afford to live separately.

And along comes Easter, Valentine’s Day, or let’s say they send a card for a holiday. That means that that they’re not separated or divorcing? No, it’s a it’s a bulk of evidence. If you’re still filing joint tax returns, if you’re still going to events as a married couple and showing yourselves as a married couple.

So let’s take this example. You and I are married, and we’re getting divorced, but we can’t afford. So we stay together for five years.

Okay, I want the date of separation to be five years ago, because Michael, I make a lot more money than you. And I don’t want to have to share any of my money with you after five years ago. You on the other hand, want it to be five years later, because we’ve lived together all this time, and we went to parties together, or we didn’t, because you will get to share a lot more of retirements.

Maybe it now becomes a long-term marriage, so you get permanent support. All of these factors are what’s causing it to come into play. So if people have questions about this, we can’t afford to actually live apart, but we have made a clear decision.

(4:22 – 4:56)
We’re filing for divorce or in mediation with you at Primus Family Law. How can they be in touch with you to ask more questions about this? Well, if you want to reach us, you can reach us directly at 619-574-8000, and someone will put you on my calendar, so I can have the pleasure of doing a consultation to find out how we can help you. Or you can reach us at www.PrimusFamilyLaw.com, and there’s an info sheet you fill out, and we will call you back.

(4:57 – 5:09)
Focus, clarity, ingenuity, and insight. That’s what you and your team at Primus Family Law always bring. Thanks, Bonnie.

See you next time. Thank you, Michael. Have a great day.