School breaks—whether summer vacation, winter holidays, or spring break—can create unique challenges for coparenting families. Camp costs, travel arrangements, and schedule coordination often lead to conflict when parents can’t agree. The California Certified Family Law Specialists at Primus Family Law Group, answer common questions about managing coparenting responsibilities during school breaks.

Q: How should parents handle disagreements about program/camp expenses during school breaks?

A: What to do with the kids during school breaks can be a major source of conflict for coparenting families. While uninsured medical expenses and childcare needed for work are mandatory shared expenses, camps/programs used during the breaks are considered discretionary unless both parents agree. Parents making different income levels may struggle when one can afford an expensive specialty camp (like horseback riding or gymnastics) while the other can afford basic day camp. The best approach is to discuss and agree on a reasonable budget in advance, ideally in writing. If you can’t agree, the court may need to determine what expenses are mandatory versus discretionary.

Q: Can I deduct summer camp costs from my child support payments?

A: No, you are never allowed to deduct expenses from court-ordered child support unless the other parent explicitly agrees in writing. Even if you’re paying for expensive school break programs, your child support obligation remains unchanged unless there’s a documented agreement.

Q: What can we do to help us communicate better about school break schedules and activities?

A: Two valuable tools that often recommended are parenting apps and coparenting classes:

• Apps like Our Family Wizard and Talking Parents) allow real-time communication about schedule changes, sharing of receipts for activities and other expenses, uploading school and camp schedules, and documenting all exchanges. These apps are considered admissible evidence in court because messages can’t be manipulated, which encourages more respectful communication.
• Additionally, the Kids Turn coparenting class, just one of many such classes in San Diego County, offers eight hours of instruction (spread over several weeks) where parents learn valuable coparenting skills separately but from the same curriculum.

Q: How can we plan extended visits during winter or spring break when family lives out of state?

A: Planning travel during school breaks requires advance coordination and clear communication always in writing. Using the coparenting app to share travel itineraries, contact information, and any special arrangements well in advance helps reduce any misunderstandings. Discuss and document who covers travel expenses, and how you’ll maintain contact with the child during the break. If your custody order doesn’t specifically address holiday or school break travel, one of Primus Family Law Group’s California Certified Family Law Specialists in San Diego County can help modify or establish court orders to include clear provisions for school breaks, alternating holidays, and out-of-state travel requirements.

Q: What happens when my ex refuses to agree on activities or camps for our children during breaks?

A: When parents can’t agree on discretionary expenses like camps or activities, the law provides that the parent who enrolls them has to pay and there is no requirement for the other parent to ensure the child participates if the activity/camp falls during their time with the child.  That doesn’t mean all is lost if you alone can’t afford it.  First, try coparenting counseling or mediation to work through the disagreement. If that fails, you may need to file a motion with the court, which can be expensive, time-consuming and stressful but the highly skilled and experienced attorneys at Primus Family Law can help you through it.  Second, you can try to get agreement on specific spending limits in advance and allow each parent to alternate choosing the activities within that budget. Remember that going to court costs far more than most summer camps, so finding reasonable middle ground protects both your wallet and your children’s wellbeing.

About Primus Family Law Group: Our California Certified Family Law Specialists bring 50+ years of combined experience exclusively serving San Diego County families. We provide zealous advocacy for what’s right and reasonable in coparenting disputes, custody matters, and all family law issues. Contact us at 619-574-8000 or at www.primusfamilylaw.com for a FREE 30-minute phone or Zoom consultation.